The funeral attendees were shocked by the behaviour of the veiled gatecrashers. They had arrived midway through the funeral, chatting and laughing loudly while covered head-to-toe in black. They were far more horrified when the deceased climbed out of the the coffin to join them.

Since my cat learned to push doors open, she often finds herself trapped trapped inside my bedroom, having shut the door herself. As I lie in bed in the dark, I hear her close the, door and feel her snuggle up against me. Minutes later, drifting off, I hear my cat scratching from the other side of my door.

It had been so hard to remember what everyone was allergic to. Nieces with gluten intolerance, grandsons with nut allergies, children with shellfish allergies, yet they all demand that I cook for all of them every Sunday. After hours of thankless work, I finally serve the meal and am certain that no one will ask me to cook again.