Tasmanian devils

On our honeymoon, my husband and I visited Tasmania which of course meant we needed to see some Tasmanian devils.

We visited a sanctuary and went on a tour in the rain. The screams were shocking and what was most unsettling was that they came from under the floors in the visitor centre. In order to give the devils a place to hide, their enclosure was extended to underneath the building.

We even got to watch their feeding time. Huge pieces of meat, so large you could recognise what it was from, pinned to the ground with stakes. This was to stop the devils dragging off the food and playing keep away with it.

During the feeding, over the sounds of eating, the keeper told us a lot of interesting facts, but only one that my husband had a follow up question to.

Apparently if you examine the whiskers of a Tasmanian devil, you can see the DNA of whatever it has eaten, within recent history. The largest animal found in that data was, as a child guessed correctly, a whale. Of course, my husband had his own question.

“Have they ever found human DNA?”

The answer was yes, followed by a very swift change of topic.

The Broadcast (Part 1)

I wouldn’t have bought the radio if I knew it actually worked. It was a gorgeous old thing, all curves and panels, like a cathedral window. It caught my eye in the antique stores window, brass knobs glinting atop elegantly carved wood.

I immediately had plans to gut it and install Bluetooth speakers. All the classiness, with none of the fuss, I thought. Certainly the price and the handwritten “sold as-is” warning on the tag made me think it couldn’t have any functional value.

I was surprised when the storekeeper picked it out of the display and a new power cord uncoiled from beneath it, bright white in contrast to the grainy wood of the radio. Someone must have gone to some effort to get this radio working. I remarked as much to the storekeeper, but was meet with a shrug and asked if I needed a box.

By the time I got home, I was excited to try it out. I hadn’t listed to the radio since my parents used to drive me to school. I now had no need (or money) for a car, and while I thought that there must be an app for the radio, it didn’t have the same novelty.

It took me an embarrassing ten minutes and a resigned web search before I found out how to turn the radio on. I was half expecting voices from its apparent era: fast talking radio hosts, smoking between reading ads for baby morphine and housewife amphetamines. But it was a disappointingly cheerful man giving the weather report. It wasn’t even right. He said that the rain was expected to continue until Tuesday – it hadn’t rained for weeks.

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Peer Pressure

Daryl stared at the coffee, watching the larger bubbles pop amongst the foam. He tried not to notice the stares of the other customers of the coffee shop.

They had been in line behind him, each ordering the same as him. A latte, skim milk, and a chocolate brownie. He only noticed when the barista drew attention to it, making a joke about us making her job too easy. Then, as Daryl sat at his usual table in the corner, the group of four sat at the larger table in the centre of the cafรฉ. He had thought it bizarre that they crammed around one side of the table, but thought they wanted to share food. But they all stared. The barista brought out the coffees, his first, then theirs. He took a hesitant sip, testing the heat, before putting it down.

Clink.

Clink. Clink. Clink. Clink.

He looked up at the synchronised sound of 4 cups being placed onto saucers. The four stared back, all still holding onto their mug handles, as he was. He tried a smile, which was returned after a moment across four faces.

It happened again, minutes later when the coffee had cooled.

Clink.
Clink. Clink. Clink. Clink.

He looked up again to see the four faces staring at him. He could not focus on any one of them, the uniformity of their attention was too intense.

He tried not to look, taking larger sips of his coffee and trying to place the cup down quietly, so he didnโ€™t hear them copying him.

Clink.
Clink. Clink. Clink. Clink.

He thought it must have been a joke. While pretending to check his phone, Daryl looked up at the groupโ€™s table. It was empty except for their orders. It must have been cleared. Well then, he thought with the spiteful spirit of an older sibling, you canโ€™t copy everything. He took a sugar packet out from the holder on his table and poured the sugar into the half-full coffee. He looked up to see all four miming shaking an almost empty packet into their coffees.

So it was a joke at his expense, Daryl thought. He was in two minds: he could finish the coffee, take his brownie away and leave these idiots behind, or he could savour them until closing and see how long it takes from the four idiots to get bored.

He downed the rest of his coffee.

Clink. Clink. Clink. Clink. Clink.

They were much more on the ball that time. There was almost no difference in timing.

Daryl was about to take the plated brownie to the counter, to ask for a container, when he instead found himself reaching for the fork. Across the room, the group did the same. He took the bite his hand offered. He chewed and put the fork back down.

Clink. Clink. Clink. Clink. Clink.

He looked up, against his every instinct. Four faces grinned at him. Daryl grinned back, rictus grins matching, apart from the glistening of tears on his cheeks.

*

A week later, Susan sat at a cafรฉ, wondering why a group of people would try to fit around the same side of a table.

She put her coffee down.

Clink.

Clink. Clink. Clink. Clink. Clink.

Three Sentence Stories (Part 12)


I thought I had been a good person throughout my life, if a little misguided at times. As I closed my tired eyes, I hoped I was good enough to be reunited with my family in heaven. Instead I found myself standing inside a pentagram surrounded by a group of very nervous cultists.


Have you ever heard someone say something that you know is wrong, but so confidently that it gives you pause? I have. Unfortunately that phrase was “it definitely isn’t loaded”.


It was the offer of a lifetime: a reality show that could clean years of dirt and clutter out of our home for free. They even swapped our house keys for a hotel card so we could spend a week decompressing before the “grand reveal”. While the show turned out to be fake, I must say that the Crime Scene cleaners did a decent job.


Dressmaking update

I have used up my entire allotment of sight today pleating this fabric.

I just meant to gather the fabric at the shoulders, then I decided to fold it, then iron it, then it got away from me.

I’d say I need to finish before Halloween, but I’d wear this fabric any day

Imposter

It was thrilling, sitting in the crowded restaurant, waiting for my date.

Her photos caught my attention immediately: her soft, wavy hair resting atop heavily tattooed shoulders. Twinkling blue eyes and a small smile. I immediately matched with her, wondering what would happen.

Those weren’t my date’s photos. I had met Amanda weeks ago. The blonde and went on 3 dates before I ended things.

But now I waited for ” Samantha”, keen to find out what the scam was.

I had picked a local restaurant I regularly visited. If the point was to waste my time and stand me up I’d come out ahead.

As I waited, I mulled on my few dates with Amanda. She had told me the meanings of the vine and rose tattoos around her shoulders. She tossed her hair behind her should so many times I wanted to tell her to tie it back. She had bored me.

But I remembered her fondly, in the end. We had what fun we could together, and I always treasure those memories.

I kept an eye on the door. My bet was that a blonde would come through them. She would be a little older, fatter or less attractive than my Amanda. Claim the photos were old, or in bad lighting. I planned to play along, just have some fun and make some new memories.

She looked exactly like the photos.

Tossing her hair back as she looked around, I was so surprised that my date was able to approach and sit down before I could react.

“Hello again” she said in Amanda’s voice. Huskier, deeper than I remembered.

I went to stand, but she grabbed my arm tightly. Too tight. Amanda never had that kind of strength.

My arm was pulled across the table, drawing all of my body closer to her. To anyone else, it would look like a quiet conversation between lovers.

I saw her tattoos, intricate and expansive. I saw her unblemished skin, without scars or marks where I knew there should be. Where wounds should be. In those places I instead saw the tattoos not quite aligning: lines separated, flowers cut in bisected and not quite made whole. As though the skin healed perfectly, but was pulled over a different shape.

As her smile widened, I saw the corners of her mouth bleed, like the skin was pulled too tight.

As her nails drew blood, I realised I was wrong. That this person didn’t look exactly like the photos. Those sparkling blue eyes, which I last saw glassy and unblinking, which I closed myself, were a different colour.

The Perfect Roommate

I have never met my roommate.

His door was always locked and he never spent time in the common areas. The only signs of life were the light under his door and the cycle of labelled foods in the kitchen being used and replaced.

It was odd at first, but I grew used to it. I might have even considered our relationship friendly, in an odd way. He communicated to me with notes, always typed for clarity. I responded with the neatest handwriting I could manage. He offered me the use of his kitchenware, even replacing my old knife set. His note said he’d noticed that the wooden block was moulding and the blades were dull.

He never pushed for a formal lease, which was a relief as I was supposed to be the only tenant.

I thought I was lucky to have found him so easily. I posted online and his was the most polite response, and said he had the deposit in cash, so I agreed. I deleted the post immediately after, in case my landlord found out. Of course, I was away the only day he could move in, so I left the door unlocked. Why, yes I do think I told him the dates I was unavailable first.

I don’t know where he has moved now. I’m not sure when he moved out. I only noticed when I saw the door was cracked open and got curious. It was so clean, apart from those dark stains on the carpet.

No, I don’t know what happened to my old knives.

You believe me, don’t you?